This letter is to reduce your impact in my mind since you only exist if I decide to remember you. I feel I don’t have the capability of not remembering your existence but I know I do.
I profoundly hate you with all my existence. I wish I could have a time machine to change you, but I know that would actually be a destructive act because I would rest time to the most important time of my life which is my present. Actually, taking the time to write you is using my present to put you in place.
I deeply love the future since I know I can program and configure it today. But then again, my hate connects me with you. I want to become indifferent towards you, then you will become invisible.
I have learned that I can´t change the past, but I can change it´s meaning which is actually good enough for most of bad memories. But there´s some bad memories which I have decided to not even change the meaning of it since it implicates to actually remember you again.
Memories are like circuits, the more you remember the more you re enforce the circuit, it´s branches that are actually called “ dendrites “ within our brain.
There´s memories that I don´t want to ever remember. What happens with my type of mind is that I remember with such an specific detail of textures, smells, geographical places, emotions that when I remember something I actually live the experience again. This is a virtue I have to visualise the future and smell, feel and proclaim it´s development.
The interesting thing is that when a loved person of mine shares painful past my mind actually takes the memory and re creates the entire context and I struggle with the memory and get to feel and thing that I can travel to the past my mind has created an feel and re feel what that person feelt when I actually don’t know. It seems as if my mind is always creating a movie of the past, other people´s past, my present, the future and other´s future.
I will find the way to live with out your, you will stop resting my time to the great present that I have. No more dendrites for you. I will learn to not think things. The brain can forget many things even when studied, I will overcome your and you will loose all power over me. Frequency re enforces memories, lack of frequency erase is it and new circuits of my awesome present and future will over come you.
In the future I will only recall remembering this letter. Every time the past tries to be present I will say “ Mr. Past, you are death and I am alive “ . This is my " Master Circuit" and it works baby !